On top of the world!
Well what can I say… I mean seriously? Not even a week ago at this moment in time I had brain surgery… and now I’m home writing my blog!
Sure I can relate to how a sloth must feel, very slow, fairly lethargic and a perhaps a little fuzzy headed at times but wow – I am already so much happier today with a big ass load of stitches down the back of my noggin to how I had been 6 or so months previous to my surgery.
I find it so difficult not to smile, I truly feel blessed and am completely overwhelmed at all the love and support I’ve had, both near and far.
I’m very slowly back dating my Chiari diary – in short the first two days after surgery were indescribable, I really have no words. I couldn’t even explain if it was the sheer amount of pain, discomfort or nausea I was feeling but there is just no way to describe those days – I wasn’t even sure if I had made the right decision, or actually if I would have been better off dead… but I’m not here to dwell on those first couple of days and as someone else who was in my shoes only two months ago told me: ‘A little it of pain for a huge amount of gain’
So whats changed already?
My hands, oh my hands! I can actually feel my fingertips again, and they’re warm!! This was a massive blow to me as Im obviously very computer based and without the sensations in my fingertips I couldn’t feel where I was clicking the mouse or even which keys I was pressing on but already I am typing so much better than before.
Not only my hands but I have had zero… that’s right, zero signs of nystagmus – this is where my eyes would involuntarily whiz off somewhere else when I was trying to look at something. Also Ive got full control over the tension in my shoulders and neck. I can physically choose when to tighten up and when to relax, previous to the surgery I was wound up so tight I was in constant discomfort.
But this isn’t all – do you know what is possibly the best change?? I haven’t actually had a headache yet!! Yes I have head pain where my stitches are beginning to pinch and heal or where a bit of my hair is caught in my bandage and pulls a little but an actual headache, nope nope nope!
Going back to the care I had in hospital was undeniably the best I have ever received. The nurses and support staff were fantastic, always smiling and nothing was too much trouble. For the first 48 hours after surgery I had a nurse in my room with me 24/7 – any noise or scuffle I made and they were straight over checking to see if I was okay, stroking my hand or forehead and I honestly felt as though they were my guardian angels. It was actually a very sad day when I knew I was going to be going home so soon, I was overwhelmed at the thought of seeing my babies who I hadn’t seen since before surgery and was forever welling up at the thought of seeing them again, but I was also so sad to be leaving all the lovely kindhearted and smiling staff at the hospital. On my last night I had so many hugs and kisses when they found out I was going to be leaving the next morning it was unreal.
And what can I say about my neurosurgeon? Well he is fantastic, Dr. Jorge Goncalves you gave me back my life, made it a life I can’t wait to start living again. I am so grateful to have had such a knowledgeable surgeon virtually on my doorstep and honestly feel as though I owe my life to him and the team that worked on me even though he was just doing his job.
Now I don’t know anything about football but I was nicknamed ‘Mourinho’ when I was in the hospital, something to do with him being the ‘special one’ – hopefully I’m right when I undestand this is a good thing…?
As I’m on a roll with gushing out praise I can’t forget my loving family, the time they have taken out of their busy schedules to come and visit me and to help look after the kids has been phenomenal. As well as the beautiful flowers, cards and love they’ve all been sending me.
Then there is Craig, my one in a gazillion – my true love, my one and only.
Now you might have expected that he would have had no choice but to look after me which is a pretty fair assumption but my god, this guy has gone far above and beyond for me. Anything I have needed help with he hasn’t batted an eyelid, just got on and done it, no huffing, puffing or ‘in a minute’ replies and most of the time he’s been two steps ahead of me. To be honest I’ve felt more than a little useless on more than one occasion. But wow, what an incredibly lucky woman I am to have by far THE MOST amazing and compassionate husband in my opinion, in the world!
Lying in hospital after surgery I certainly had a few life defining moments, and am super excited to get back to full heath so I can again start living life. I can see a huge bright light at the end of what used to be a very dark and miserable tunnel. I’m even going to start a post Chiari accomplishment list – where I’ll document everything I have achieved from this point on.
Life is incredible and 110% worth living, its just so frustrating it takes something like this to really make you appreciate it.